Ask Anything Friday

Gather round, children.
Gather round my screen.
Don’t worry about
the flickering lights:
maintenance is on the way.

Our first question is from Cayla M
who wants to know again
why we have to live
in a stupid bunker. Class
what’s the short answer?
That’s right: nanoplastics.
And the long answer is
sentient nanoplastics.
And the snarky answer is
you’re lucky to be alive.

Next we have Katy N
who wants more
carrots for lunch.
I’m not in charge of that.

Katy S asks what’s the point.
Great question! A return to
profitability of course for
Dapplezon and its remaining
employees: you! Once the plastic
seas subside. Eventually.

Scott S misses his mom. Me too,
Scott. Me too. She knew these
ventilation systems inside and out.

Henso H asks if I can smell
his farts. Very funny.

Ellie A: absent today. “Why
are the nanoplastics?” Not a
complete question. Remember
syntax. Remember also last week’s
history module, where we learned
how the government
along with Dapplezon’s rival
corporations, propagated this crisis.
Propagated: that word means
 did this to us.
Will we forget, class?

Harjit N asks if I’m made
of sentient nanoplastic.
Hmmmm. Interesting
and subversive. A bonus
mark for you.

Niki R is tired of talking
about fertility. My goodness
where is maintenance at?

Anton V asks if there will be
a person-teacher again instead
of Dapplezon’s boring old AI
screens. Very hurtful, Anton.
You know I’m doing my best
under difficult circumstances.

Hopefully you’ll be the teachers
one day.
     Then you’ll understand.